Freecycle... do you do it?

Do you even know what freecycle is? It is a yahoo group probably one in your area if you look it up. Freecycle allows you to post wanteds and offers of basic things you might need or want to get rid of. People will come pick it up from you if it will serve them a purpose. Or someone might offer up something you want. Works both ways.

 

Sometimes freecycle gets a bad name. One time I had someone reply to pick up something that I was offering. I specifically requested for people to only reply who can pick up in the next couple days because I wanted this item gone. Then I didn't hear back from her for a day. So I assumed she changed her mind and went off to the next person in line and offered it to them. Well a day and a half later she replied, apologizing for not replying in a timely fashion and that she was ready to pick it up. I had to tell her it was already gone and explained the situation to her. She accused me of being why freecycle gets such a bad name. It was because of people like me. And my thought on that is, if you replied to my email about what you wanted in like 10 minutes, then reply to my next email about making arrangements timely. After all you didn't have any problem getting to me to be first in line on my list of wanters.

 

Another issue with freecycle that I often hear is that people say they pick something up and then they DON'T SHOW UP. Don't be this person. This is such a great program for repurposing items. Don't be the person who makes things harder for the givers. I am a giver. I have received a few things from freecycle but mostly I have been on the giving end of things.

 

So I hope she won't be offended that I posted this photo. (She will probably never see it???) This is a lady who recently received two black garbage bags full of fabric from me. I sadly decided it was time to part with the fabric in my fabric closet that was taking space. I haven't quilted in years. I haven't sewn anything with that fabric in years. "Years" is long enough to let it go, I suppose. I am purging this week.

Anyway this lady who picked up my fabric sent me this photo. She makes fabric grocery bags. My fabric most of it was not as cool as this one I suppose. But I am glad it went to a good home and a great cause. Boy I hate those Kroger bags that fill up in my cabinet. I take them to recycle at Kroger when I remember, but I never forget how at the landfill tour last year, the tour guide told us that the worst thing to deal with (in the land fill AND in recycling) are those plastic grocery bags. They install fences at the landfill whose purpose is to keep those bags from flying everywhere. And the ones that make it to the recycle bin constantly get stuck in the recycler. Can't we find a better way??? My freecycle partner does :-)

Editors Note: If the unnamed maker of these fab bags happens upon my blog from the signature of my email I sent her, and wants credit for her work, I would update it with her info... with her permission of course :-)

Co Op

So off to Coop. Bret's favorite class last year was Botany. Same teacher, same curriculum, new topic... Human Anatomy. Two weeks we have worked on the history of science and cell anatomy. Today, after the quiz we made a cell with jello and candy. Mitocondria, nucleus, lysosomes, etc. Too much fun. Then Bret took the jello cell home and shared the fun.

Girl Scouts afar...ish

Brenda's Girl Scout troop has finally reached the point of no return. Too many girls have moved on the other activities. Junior high does that to kids out here. Suddenly there is cheerleading, volley ball, and topped with band, swim team, neighborhood soccer, and everything else that shows up at about 7th grade. We knew we would combine troops this year, but the other troop has actually transformed their dynamics. It has gone from 5-6 graders to half the troop being 5-6 graders and the other half to be 4th graders. Brenda comes to the meetings, but being an 8th grader is not getting enough out of it.

So this year she is a Juliette. A Juliette is a Girl Scout who doesn't have a troop. There is a homeschool troop available for her age group about 1/2 hr away from us. I offered to take her there and try it out. I even switched my Junior/Cadette meeting dates so they don't conflict with the homeschool troop meetings. They have a set-up that is really pretty cool. It is in a church gym that has a layer of doors on both sides with classrooms. The Daisies/Brownies get a classroom, the Junior/CSA's get a room, and the CubScouts get a room. So all ages can participate and be working within their Scout age group.

Today we showed up, me, Brenda, and Marley (6). Bret chose not to go with us. So Brenda went to the classroom for her age group. I asked Marley did she want to try out the Daisy/Brownie troop activities even though she has a troop starting in a few weeks. She said no but promptly changed her mind when she saw that room full of like-aged girls.

Brenda was not impressed. Marley cannot WAIT to come back, stating that she will drop her other troop if it means she cannot come back to this one. lol. I asked Brenda to give it a few more tries. If it doesn't work after that she can move on. Marley will go back anyway. Marley thought she finally found a place where she could fit in that wasn't too cliquey for her to meet friends. Brenda thought it might be too cliquey for her to get comfortable. Funny what a difference a few years makes.

Meet SQUISHY CAT BRIAN

Meet squishy cat brian. I got this photo off Brenda's facebook. Someone at Walmart (where appearantly she and her friend dressed up all goofy and went walking the aisles to see their effect on other people) gave her a fish and the receipt to go with it. So now we have this fish. It will need its own bowl, because although she told me it wasn't a gold fish, she is now calling it a gold fish. Clearly if she likes squishy cat brian she won't put it with the turtles.

Anyway she is coming home today. Which she regrets. She says to me, but when I come home I will have to deal with Lily waking me up early every morning and I hate that. To which I say, well that is because you keep us up at night with your loudness. Since Dad has to get sleep to wake up and work to pay the bills, he trumps your need to stay up late and loud with his need for quiet sleep.

More than once, in the last couple years, we have discussed the IF THEN chapter in the parent book I was given to read upon agreeing to take on this job position at this company called. And specifically how it relates to our sleeping needs, and the respect of others' sleeping needs.

Brenda feels she needs to sleep away a good portion of her day and stay awak a good portion of her night. Gaige feels he needs to sleep early, since he wakes up at 6:30am to get ready to school. Sometimes Bret (my husband big Bret) wakes up even earlier than that.

Here is how the IF THEN clause works, in relation to our sleeping needs. If you are quiet while others sleep, THEN you can stay up as long as you would like. IF you are loud, and passively or agressively disregard the needs of the sleepers, THEN you go to sleep. IF you cannot sleep because you are not tired yet, THEN you may go to your room quietly and do something like watch a movie with your ipod and headphones. IF you still cannot stay quiet after that, AND this continues for repeated nights, THEN you will wake up early so you are more tired at night.

We are all late sleepers and late go-to-bedders. So when I say we want to go to bed early, most likely that is 12am-ish. Except for Gaige who does go to sleep about 10:30 or 11 on school days. When I say "you will wake up early" that is most likely 10:30 or 11am. Not 7 or 8 in the morning. I am not usually even up at that time.

Meaningless School board Quote

If you have been around for a while, you will remember when I used to post the meaningless school board quotes from the school across the street. As far as schools go, I am sure it does its job. I mean it no disrespect. I know the school works hard to produce students who think like the state tests say they should think. And even try to put a little extra in there when they have time to do more than work toward standardized tests.

I have acquaintances who work there and I feel confident that they feel they are doing important work. I have no doubt they are sincere in their pursuit for a better world through the children they teach. I hope they are not offended by my wanting a different way, as I am not offended by their path. There are a million ways to be, and I don't hold a monopoly on the right way. There are many right ways for many different people. When we can all do our different things in different ways and live happily together, that is real success in the "fight for peace".

AND I cannot stand the ridiculousness of the posts on the school board outside the school. I don't know where these come from. With all the amazing inspiring quotes out there, I don't understand what the quote person is doing? These quotes are seldom inspiring and hardly ever make sense. This is a new one out recently.

"I would rather regret what I have done, than regret what I haven't done."

((((SIGH)))) If I was one of the parents on the PTA who helped fundraise for the purchase of this school board, I would be a little upset at its use. Does anyone else pass it by and sigh? Sometimes we slow down to read it, my whole family, then shake our heads. Sometimes my husband will catch a new one before me and he will update me on the new nonsensical quote. Then we shake our heads. I wish I could exactly remember the one from last spring that likened "untaught and unschooled" children to weeds. Then the teachers turn them into flowers. I cannot imagine my family would feel better about this if our kids went to school there.

Other meaningless school board quotes that they might want to consider in the future...

If you bring your homework home, then you can learn at home too.
If you teach a child to fish, he will kill fish AND worms.
If you teach a child to garden, he will kill veggies too.
Stay inside, and you won't get burned by the sunlight.
Creativitiy happens best with a pencil and paper in hand.
Children learn best when they are taught.

Not that I think the quote master in charge of the meaningless school board needs any help.

Why Do I Want My 13 Year Old To Go Away?

Why do I want her to away next summer to Canada to a community of NonEnglish speaking people? Because the family is so amazing? Because of the chance to really emerse herself in a new language? Because maybe she will become more worldly? To visit her friend? What?

I have had time to think about this for a year and a half now since Brenda has started asking me about going. That is right, she was 11 when she started asking to travel. There is swim team, Girl Scouts, summer camp, maybe even roller derby tournaments she might be missing out on. What could possibly make traveling that far over there worth the time and effort? Just so that my 13 year old can have a "visit". Especially when my husband so strongly disagrees with going.

None of those reasons are why I want her to go. Yes they might all happen or be true. But none of those are why.

When I was younger I played the oboe. I wanted to be in an orchestra some day. One of my dreams was to go take the train to a school of arts in Chicago instead of going to the local ps. I didn't ever get to do that, but the idea made me feel so amazingly free. Like I could reach any of my goals if I could just be free to do it my way. Several times as a youth I have felt that way. The times I went  to band camp and I was away from home, free to be who I wanted to be without parents, teachers, friends telling me what to do.  When I moved out on my own at 18 and lived and studied in Chicago, carrying a full time job to pay my own bills, and doing what I loved to do. I felt free. I could do ANYTHING and I knew it in a way I no longer do... Something about being young and on my own. It made me see things differently. Living with the same people forever (even if forever is only 13 years) your ideas and thoughts are influenced by them. Your daily plans are influenced by them. Your wake-up times, your friends, your political views, your view of yourself, it is all influenced by the people who surround you.

What if you could go somewhere else and be influenced by other people? Where would you go? Why is 18 the magic number for this? Why before 18 are you required to only be influenced by the people who live around you, which is dependent on so many factors that you have no control over. Why don't most kids get the choice to decide who else they want to influence their days?

Of course now more than ever, with internet, phones, facebook, twitter, youtube, etc etc etc. people can get in touch with almost anything if they choose to. Still so many kids stay put. Their facebook is filled up with their local friends, and their friends friends. And maybe a bunch more kids they don't even know just to fill up their numbers. Their follow famous people on twitter but don't see how they could make their own futures just like those people are doing.

All these famous people, they were just ordinary people once. Doing ordinary stuff. Going to ordinary school. With their ordinary friends.

She isn't asking to go across the world to France. She is asking me to take a trip across the boarder so she can have the experience she wants to have. We CAN afford it. It is not outrageous. I can take the other kids and do some awesome sight seeing, stop at museums, go to a lake-side beach or two, and really make it a trip for them to remember too.

So I am not living the life of an amazing orchestral oboist. I think I am doing something far better. Famous amazing orchestral oboists of the world might disagree. I however think I have been afforded this amazing experience that I couldn't have dreamed up better than this.And sometimes when the weather is perfect and the breeze fills the air with that swish of tree leaves waving to me, or a smell hits me that reminds me of something from long ago, I feel that free feeling of childhood again for just a moment. And I feel sad and happy all at once. I wish for those days back again, and I am glad that they happened. And they remind me to be the cheerleader who wishes for that feeling in my own kids.
 So what are we waiting for? I think we can get to Canada. And we can get back again.

And we have plenty of time to prepare...

Why do they sleep?

It is almost 11pm on a Saturday. I have facebooked, emailed, taken the dogs out for an extra long walk and fed them, eaten a significant (more than I would like to admit here) amount of the leftover pizza from last night's late-night snack, chatted to my son a bit, done all my morning beauty traditions in the bathroom (peed, washed my face with soapy water, and put my unbrushed hair in a ponytail is about the extent of that unless I decide to take a shower later), and I am heading to do some much needed house cleaning when I get off the computer soon.

EVERYONE IS STILL ASLEEP!! Now I know they were up until 12 or 1am. Heck I was up until about 2am. Even my husband, who was so sure he was getting up at 3 or 4am to head to KY to go hunting for this massive 14point +drop tine buck that he saw on one of his cams, is STILL SLEEPING.
Now I love to sleep. I am a horrible monster to anyone who wakes up up in the middle of my sleep for ANYTHING. And until I am completely awake I don't even realize how bad I am being. (My husband is the same way, btw. And he takes it a step further where his waking up takes a lot longer and a lot of cups of coffee.) I am not a morning person. I can't stand the sound of alarm clocks. I have painful memories of being a teenager, waking up to my alarm for school. I don't like morning activities (sorry CO OP friends!! I still love YOU, just not waking up to SEE you.) I cannot stand that spot where I am still dreaming but on my way to waking up. You know that part in your dream where you keep it going in your mind even though you are waking up because YOU DON'T WANT TO.

I digress. The point being is I can relate to needing sleep and not wanting to wake up. But REALLY. At some point in time enough is enough. By 11am I start to think the day is being wasted. There is so much to do. So much to see and be part of! But still every day 11, 12, 1pm waking up. Why did God make us so that so much of our day and night are gone to dreams? Do you see this light shining right on Marley's face? The sun is trying to tell her something. She just isn't listening. WAKE UP SLEEPY HEAD! I want to wake them all up! But I won't. They are all as cranky as me when they are stirred. I wonder why that is????

Girl Scouts strikes again

This mess was actually bigger than you can see. For starters, we have never had to move 3 tables together to make our meetings work.We went from 9 girls last year (which felt like overload) to 14 girls this year. And we were missing a few still. I have to say they were remarkably quick at picking up when we were done. But the noise and the amount of time it took to quiet everyone down, I was quite on overload when we got home, which my girls can attest to.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall........

So here we were after we made our egg-saving devices, at the school by the big wall. Each girl got a change to drop her egg, hoping the device she made was enough to keep her egg from the sad and quick death of crack(ing). Bret's egg survived, but it took a spill at home. She put it in a bowl in the fridge and let itset until tomorrow's breakfast scramble. :-)

I'm just gonna DO IT...

All this talk about travel lately. And young travel even.
http://www.bootsnall.com/articles/12-09/giving-teens-the-freedom-to-travel.html

http://www.wanderingeducators.com/intercultural-education/resources/tips-encouraging-success-and-responsibility.html


I finally said ok I will make it work. Brenda has been trying to find a way up to our French Canadian scouting friends that we met years ago at Kalahari. We see them every year (except for last year when they couldn't make it to the UWG.) Brenda and Melanie's oldest daughter, who is Brenda's age and speaks pretty good english, became friends. They also have a daughter who is Bret's age and one who is a little older than Marley. So it worked well that they would hang out at the water slides together. Melanie's younger two daughters didn't speak much english, and it was fun to learn from them.

 

Since meeting them, Brenda uploaded an app to her ipod to help her work on French basics, numbers, colors, days of the week, months of the year. But now that there seems like an end in sight, I bet we will see a more renewed interest in her French.

We found a free online website www.busuu.com which may help bridge some of her gap. We had put it aside for other things. But I will update when I can as to where she is in her plans to travel and mesh in with the french speaking Canadians.

So Melanie and I have decided that next summer will be enough time for me to make all the plans (you know, like getting a passport, and such) and they will be good to have her for a visit.

They scout through the summer. Their scouts is coed, and they do much of their work related to the water and boats. Plus their homeschool group meets through the summer too. It will be great to get them together and let Brenda finally experience what it is like somewhere other than here. It is a baby step anyway.

It is a two day trip of 8 hr driving a day to get there, or it is a two day trip of 10 hrs a day if we stop in NJ and visit some of our other UWG friends for a small driving break. I am considering taking this chance for me and my other girls to drive around up in that part of the US and see some sights as well...

The wheels are a turnin...

Crazy game at the Wendy's

So we usually don't go to Wendy's (which is barely a block and a half from our house.) Because who can afford that too regular, and it is fast food. We do head over there sometimes when the kids are at school for a frosty... JUST because we CAN.

This day Dad gave us a $15.00 gift card he earned playing some bingo game at work or something, so I decided we would treat ourselves to dinner. Well originally I though lunch, but the guy came 1-1/2 hours late to fix the washing machine. So I was stuck at home to almost 3:30p with him. My day was practically over, and lunch was long gone when he was done.

Anywho we went to dinner at Wendy's. And for the first time in years, Marley got to purchase a Happy Meal. And boy was it a HAPPY meal. tehehe hahaha. No but really. She got this game where you put a card on these glasses and put the glasses on. So everyone else can see your card but  you. Then you go around the table asking questions in turn to figure out what your card is. It was so much fun that I purchased another set (which btw you can do for $.99) so that little Bret could play too. We laughed and laughed for at least an hour. Gaige showed up for the free food, but left bag in hand, probably so we didn't have to embarrass him with our presence. lol. Teens. Brenda is off to bigger better things in Sandusky. So it was just us 3 girls laughing our butts off on this sill game.

We had such a great time!!! Then we came home and got Dad in on the game. I consider purchasing more so we can play it at scouts too... we will see.

Nothing says fall like...

As I sit around stewing about my dream of homesteading in KY on my farm, yet living in Cincinnati in a house with no yard, and only a walkway around our building, I am reminded that I am not living in the moment, but rather living in what I want the future to be.

I love when the weather starts to cool down. When the cool breeze makes me crack open the drawer with my homemade knitted and/or crocheted cool-weather accessories, I start to feel like I might already be there. (Our property in KY, that is.) Putting on my warm sweaters and shawls, snuggling up to a good book with my warmie socks and a crocheted blanket that is as old as my son (who just turned 18yo OMG!!) maybe a hot bowl of soup on my nightstand. I know!! I shouldn't eat in bed. I always spill.

Well that was how I was feeling yesterday morning anyway. This morning I went out to walk the dogs... (that is because we don't have a yard and only a walkway around our building) it was hot again. I guess I will have to wait a little longer for the smell of dead leaves to overtake me when I walk out the door.

Until then, I shall live in the remnants of summer... :-)

People and Companies who try to deceive me and YOU...

So if you are keeping up, you see that my DH and I went out to eat at the Golder Corral the other day. He often goes to eating little carbs to curb his weight issues. Golden Corral is a great place for him to eat, because he can eat all meat and still fill up, rather than getting a plate of food that gets passed mostly to me.

So he is off filling up a plate and I am reading our receipt. When our waitress had come over to us she reminded us (as they always do) about our chances to win $1,000 daily if we get online and fill out a survey. So I am reading about the survey that she circled for us. Here is what it reads...

10 Chances to win $1,000 Daily Plus weekly prizes valued at $1500. Survey, Rules, Eligibility, sweepstakes, and previous winners at.. "whatever website" blah blah blah.

Reread that and tell me how many $1,000 they are giving away a week. My husband is really good at seeing past people's crap so I read it to him and asked him how much they are giving away a week. (BTW this same survey has been on our receipt for months.)

Bret (my husband, not my daughter) says $70,000. His math is really good too.

I told him there is no way they are giving away $70,000 a week. There is no way. But listen: 10 chances to win $1,000 daily... Well that MIGHT just mean that ten people daily get their names added to the bowl of names that some day will be picked through for a $1,000 winner. Or maybe there will be 5 $1,000 winners some day. Why do they feel compelled to deceive us? Why can't they just tell the truth? Who decided that the best way for companies to get what they want is to lie to us? And HOW can we possibly turn this around.

So many liars and deceivers in the world. How do we help our children learn to combat them all? Little children lie because they want to get what they want and they want their adults to be happy all at the same time. Adults lie because they want to get what they want and don't care anymore about who it will affect. We live in this world with them. These people are being raised by our country of people. Do we have any idea how many of our congresspeople have criminal records? The list is so long I don't have room for it here.  They are being raised in our American communities and our American schools. They are running our country and raising more American people. Who has the guts to stop all this? Anyone? Dem Rep. Doesn't matter. They are lying and cheating, stealing, making laws that hurt us, and cushion themselves. Then they blame eachother for the state of our country so we can take sides and tear ourselves apart. They are smart. They know if we stand together, none of them will win. The are all full of... well you know. Its not just them. Its not just banks, or Wall Street. It is everywhere.

There are lots of good people out there, living good lives. I know this. We all know this. Lots of loving parents trying to help our children become loving people. How do we make this the majority? How to we produce a next generation that gets closer to being the loving people, that our generation is unable to be. How do we make the schools see that the lesson of caring and kindness is more important than memorizing the periodic tables. Or that loving who you are will get you further than learning what 3y+4y=.

I was once accused of being a Pollyanna. That was years ago.

Love Science AND Steve Spangler

So this is our second year attending a Monday Co op. (We have affectionately termed it the coop). Our first year was left with mixed reviews. It worked better for some of my kids than others. I didn't care for doing the coop, but one of my girls couldn't wait to go back. (I should follow this up with my opinion, so there are no misunderstandings. The people were for the most part nice and friendly. It was more structure than I like to have. And waking up the kids to get there on time was always a hassle for me, which I would rather not have. It was not the quality of the coop I didn't like, which btw is a religious based co op mostly "school at home" families using Mondays to suppliment their curriculum. We don't do that.

We went back and forth until the last day of registration as to whether or not we would do it again. Turns out we will. We had two coops we were considering, the other one more unschooly. In the end, Bret really wanted to stick with this science "teacher" she had last year and LOVED. Her teacher says, "I don't teach the science. You learn the science at home. In the class we celebrate all the learning you did during the week." Bret cannot wait to get home and work on this book... my girl who went to the co op last year telling me if anything feels "schooly" she is outta there. Plus she LOVES her TaeKwonDo class. So we stayed.

Well first Monday, come and gone. We have been plugging away at our new book and journaling notebook all week so she will be ready to "celebrate" come next Monday, when she decided she wanted to make that cornstarch/water mix and play with liquid to solid. Which turned into getting out the Borax and glue for some Oobleck for them to play.

Suddenly I check my email and Steve Spangler is there with his amazing experiments! Love this dude. We will be doing this one tomorrow, probably. Or Friday, if Girl Scout planning takes too much time out of my day.

Anyway Check it OUT!!!!

http://www.stevespanglerscience.com/experiment/red-cabbage-chemistry?tab=video&utm_source=Steve+Spangler+Science&utm_campaign=63ba8ad310-EOW_20120912&utm_medium=email

My Husband Weighs In

We are home now. Home from where the incident took place. And the situation continued along those lines the rest of the time we were there. No more physical abuse occured between them.

....Is that really physical abuse, you ask? That is a debate for another time. I tell my kids there is no excuse for abuse. Physical Abuse in our house means any time someone touches you in a way that you don't approve your body being touched like. If it isn't a clear line like hitting, for instance maybe you don't like being tickled, then the first "no stop" is a clear STOP sign. Put another way, I tell my kids that as an adult when someone tells you stop and you don't stop, you might go to jail. I don't mean stop putting so much jelly on my sandwiches. I mean stop touching me like that. Stop doing that to me. Stop hitting me....

Anyway now we are home. I believe we have a really busy week ahead, so really today I didn't do much of anything. Just lazed around tired because I felt tired from our trip. I haven't even unpacked our tubs of stuff yet. Figured I would have more energy for other stuff tomorrow when I need it.

My husband wanted to go to Bass Pro to return some things he bought and decided they wouldn't work for him. Then he said he noticed the Golden Corral that I told him was by Bass Pro and did I want to get a bite together with him. I said sure. And I sure could use the break after those last four exhausting days I had. (Fun! But exhausting.)

At dinner I asked him to weigh in. His opinion is often very opposite from my way of thinking. I know this. I still ask for his opinions often. And I think on it. He is a pendulum that swings one way and I am the pendulum that swings the other way. A lot of times we help eachother meet in the middle. Not always. And the middle is not always where either one of us wants to be. But sometimes when I hear his point of view it helps me to at least see where the middle is for a vantage point in my thoughts.

I told him, "My thought on unschooling is that we learn to do whatever we want with consideration for not doing harm to others." (One might say, 'but you cannot always do what you want without "harming" others'. This is where my thoughts get murky. Because sometimes hurt creates growth, one might say. Sometimes hurt is not really me HURTING you or your feelings directly. Maybe I said something that you disagreed with and that hurt your feelings because you think my beliefs go against who you are, for instance. Anyway I didn't say any of this to him. I just think it while I am talking to him. And this is not the hurt that I speak of.)

We start talking about how you "can" do whatever you want but there are consequences. And then I agree but I remind him that if we let life's consequences instead of "our family made" consequences take their course, they can still learn those same lessons, right? (The truth is that real life consequences are not always there. This girl doesn't get in trouble for what she does to my daughter. And no doubt if I called her on it, she would have a different story, if for no other reason than because no one saw it to say otherwise and she seems to be sneaky enough to know it.) He says but then why not ask everyone, 'who wants to do heroin'? Why not let 10 year olds smoke even though we know that at 10 years old the reality of death from lung cancer is not really something that he grasps like we do. After all how many times have I said I am lucky to be alive after all the things I did as an 18, 19, 20 year old. I thought I was invincible. And all of that is true.

So I tell him, "Why not do whatever you want?" He doesn't like it when I ask him things this way. To him the why not is clear. So what am I really asking him, he probably thinks. He says, "What do you mean" in an irritated voice. "Why not do whatever we want all the time? So what? So what if we do?" He says in his own words, look over to the ghettos and trailer areas to find out why not. I ask what he means. Because I am wondering if he means the quality of people and the quality of their lives, or if he means the violence that seems more prevelant in those areas. So he says that how about the people at our exit with their signs begging for food. "So what," I say, "if they WANT to sit on the side of the street with signs begging for food? If they COULD live different but CHOSE not to then SO WHAT?" That is my point. Whatever you do, if it is what you WANT TO DO then so what to the world if you do it? Even if it is sitting at the side of the street begging. I know it doesn't "look" good. And I know we don't WANT that for our children. But if it is what someone wants to do, then pitch to me why it is not ok? (Feel free to respond to these questions yourself if you choose. Keep it clean and friendly please.)

But I know I am back peddling, with this line of questions. Because begging for food doesn't REALLY hurt anyone, and I was originally talking about doing whatever you want when it hurts someone else. Luckily my husband notices this, or at least chooses not to continue on this path. He doesn't like these kinds of conversations.

So his response is... "You could say whatever you want to me. I could punch you in the mouth. We both did what we wanted to do. Yes I might go to jail for punching you. Yes you might have to go to the hospital for saying what you said. But we both did what we wanted."

Here our convo ended. What do you think about THAT?

I Am An Unschooler and so I Can Do Whatever I Want

So many things on my mind lately. So where even to start.

 My daughter had opportunity to meet up with a homeschooler recently. An unschooler. This isn't the first time she met her, and each time this girl tells her she hates her, berates her, and tries to shun her from activities. Luckily we only see her once or twice a year. But each time I hear the same thing. Also my other teen daughter agrees that this girl is just plain mean. She says she doesn't know what her problem is.

So this time, things were the same. The girl was just mean and rotten to her. My girl is bubbly sometimes to an extent that might be considered annoying to some people. She gets excited about things and her giddiness might be looked upon as not cool to some older kids. Maybe. And I don't even know if this is what the issue is, other than I know this has been something that has come up in her past. So anyway, the girl started her same behavior. And my daughter told me. I told her to stay away from the girl. The first night my two daughters happened to be staying awake with a bunch of kids until late into the night. Quite possibly they didn't get any sleep at all. Me? I was asleep, and I had dragged my 6 year old down with me in hopes of salvaging her mood for the next day of fun.

When I wake up, my daughter who is being bullied by this girl tells me that this girl slapped her and shoved her up against a wall because she didn't like something my daughter did or said or whatever. My daughter said she smacked this girl back and asked her what was her problem. It does seem that she causes most of her bullying trouble in the evenings when parents are suspiciously absent (due to appearantly needing sleep, go figure, lol.)

Put aside making this into any kind of a high horse who is wrong or who is right or is it ok to hit issue, for a moment. Or really put it aside for good. That isn't what this is about at all. What I am about to quote next is what this whole series of posts will be related to...

This girl tells my daughter..."I am not a homeschooler. I am an unschooler. So I can do whatever I want."

I am an unschooler so I can do whatever I want. This is the theme of my next series. If you have any comments on my writings at all good or bad advice or otherwise, please throw it out there on my blog or you can email me at melodiecoz@yahoo.com if commenting on the blog doesn't fit your needs.

UGO (Pronounced YOU GO)

Brenda has a friend. She lives about four hours from our home. She also has friends in NY and NJ and Canada, Spain, NC, etc etc etc. She has a couple friends who live around us, but mostly they are a distance away. So anyway back to my point, Brenda has a friend about 4 hours away from us. She sees her twice a year. Once at UGO (sounds like YOU GO) and once at UWG (Sounds like Kalahari, lol.) They spend 4 or 5 days at UGO or UWG then they flit back to her or my house for a week or so visit. Her mom and I meet in the middle when their stay is over and deliver children back to their dwelling space.

 

It is through her friend that I know about UGO. Once a year in September there is a gathering at a local Ohio unschoolers at a campout. It is communal style, or cabin style, depending which people prefer. There is a lake to boat and swim on. Appearantly last year there was a nerf gun war that went on the whole time. Lots of activities set up by the homeschoolers who attend. Last year we went for one night, because I had to pick Brenda up from her week at her friend's house. We had plans for the weekend so we couldn't stay. But I think it was 5am when I finally woke up and told my girls they HAD to get some sleep before we headed out in the morning.

This year we will stay for the whole 3 nights, 4 days. It is somewhat like a NOT back to school get-together for my girls. They will know a bunch of people there already and meet some new ones too. Brenda is hosting a funshop for duct tape fun. Bret and I are hosting a hula hoop funshop. We leave tomorrow so we will see what comes of this trip.

Brenda's new hair color for the trip. lol. (Clairol Natural Instincts 23R. Lasts 28 shampoos.)

When we come back from this weekend... it all starts again. Monday is the first day of co op. It is also my service unit mtg for Girl Scouts. Thursday starts my Girl Scout meetings. And away we go...